just a little confused.

you are always on my mind still.

I keep coming back to you, texting you and calling you, you’re my safety
net when I get hurt, which probably isn’t a good thing. you live so far away I guess I feel like I can do this, but I’m playing with your emotions and I shouldn’t be doing that…

looks like I was right, thought you were fricken different I just don’t understand, but I do like your honesty and how you didn’t lead me on thanks for that.

so getting to know you these past couple of weeks has been great, you’re so sweet, and I am
starting to like you more and more. but I’m just so afraid that you are gonna hurt me. or I’m gonna hurt you. why do I think like this… uhhh you make me laugh, you treat me well, you compliment me, you make me blush, I mean you’re so nice; but I’m afraid you have another reason to act like this… and I just want my friends to like you but I just have a feeling after a while they won’t, oh man…

I don’t know why I number these, but any who. last night I held your hand, why’d I do that I barely know you, i mean you’re cute, but I just don’t know like anything about you, I’m kind of mad at myself for letting myself do that, cause now I have to like break things off with twf again, why am I so stupid… :(

wow, that’s all I can say.

i remember why i like talking to you, you make me laugh so much :)

seriously here I am once again, waiting for you for an hour to Skype. and what happens nothing. I am so frustrated right now I just want to punch you. and on top of that your phone is broke so how are we gonna talk, we probably won’t, I don’t need this stress in my life. uhg. why.

I know this is a bad path to go down, but why can’t I stop…

that was probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do, I mean we were almost together but, I think it was for the best, I didn’t wanna hurt you in the long run like I knew I would… I just know that you are gonna be hurting and I won’t be able to do anything about it, because I am the one who caused it. I guess we are just better off as friends but I bet after tonight we won’t be talking for a very long while.

ok, so you don’t even know me that well, and you’re accusing me of liking someone, because we text; are you serious?? I am so angry. I mean I would understand if we hung out all the time, but all we do is text, about doctor who or our days, like I don’t even know I’m kind of angry.

I just hate when two of my close friends fight, and then I feel stuck in the middle. it happens so often lately it’s not fun. and then to top it off I miss you so much, we haven’t even hung out yet and I think I just want to be your girlfriend but I’m so scared of hurting you or getting hurt uhg life is so confusing, and I’m so tired right not its ridiculous… lol and tomorrow I bet I’m gonna kill someone because I’ll be so tired…

I hate you so much, I can’t let myself fall for your lies. and I really need to stop myself from talking to you, at all; I am going down a path I won’t be able to come back from. you are so wrong for me and bad and I can’t let my self start to like you, I like a great guy who would treat me right. I don’t have time for your non sense…!!!!

so I’m having sharp pains in my chest, and I’m really scared. and then one of my closet friends just told me he liked me, and I dont feel the same way. I’m just in pain, but also causing pain. uhg well rough night.

so today went well I would say, I went to Pizza Hut with my bestfriend :) told the guy I liked, that I liked him & he likes me back :) it’s gonna be hard if we date not seeing him all the time, but I’ll just have to make time to see him. I’m gonna be soon an army girlfriend I think, :D I’m actually starting to get happy.